A note about the timing of this post... I worked on this last week and again yesterday. I wanted it posted prior to this "day at the spa". But it did not work, I don't know why, but you know the devil is in the details! And I could not get it to post this morning at 5:30 when I was sitting at my computer. Now I knowwhy...all about timing...and God not being finished with the post. Things added to the post this morning will be marked with Update.
In a Bible study this week we talked about the "providential hand of God"...God's hand in our lives. How He truly does work ALL things for good. Even if we can't see the good at the time. Even if we know it is not what we wanted, that the outcome is bad. It caused me to think about all the things in my past that have brought me where I am today. Starting with being raised by my folks in Mission, TX and going to Catholic school...good things. To meeting Bruce...a very good thing. To my children and their spouses. God's hand was in all of it. There were many ups and downs...many crisis...many doors closed (thank you God!) and many doors opened (thank you God!) But when you stop and look back you can see how each thing played out perfectly "for such a time as this" Esther 4:14. I suggest that this is a wonderful exercise, a wonderful growing in faith exercise for all of us Think about the past, all the good and bad, and look for God's hand in your life.
Update:I looked up from my reading this morning as we were driving to the med center. 6:45. A bit late. We were late because we stopped for Shipley donuts and we still needed to stop and pick up breakfast. But I had already prayed for peace, so I settled back for the rest of the trip. We were on Bellaire heading to MDA where the railroad tracks cross Bellaire...one with crossing arms... which were still up. As we crossed over I saw the train headed our way, maybe two or three streets over (hence the arms were still up. Did not want you to think that we tried to outrun the train!). If we had been a few seconds later, that long train would have stopped us and I would have gone bonkers! But it didn't. God had timed it perfectly. Yes, I do believe that is my growing awareness of the providential hand of God.
Update: I am now at MDA receiving my 6th "spa"treatment with super efficient Titus as my nurse.
All is going great. After chemo 5, I experienced many days of fatigue and a muddled mind...and I did not like it one bit! Honestly I think I was afraid it might not go away and that this may be my new normal. I got all anxious about it - anxious anxiety. But Psalm 62:5 reminded me "You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trust in you." So this was another example of my need to call on God, to put my trust in Him and His perfect plan for me. Praise God, the fatigue only lasted four and 3/4 days, but it left and I was back to my old self. (Correction: the fatigue left...not to sure about the muddled mind!) In Streams in the Desert I read "God provides resting places as well as working places. So rest and be thankful when He brings you, tired and weary to streams along the way." Yes, fatigue and a muddled mind are from God and I will joyfully accept them and rest. So my day at the"spa" will be followed by restful days at home. And I will whisper to the Lord for help when my foggy brain prevents me from spending quality time with Him. I will ask God to be with me instead of giving into the foggyness. God has it all planned, I just need to trust Him more.
Update: another example of God's providential hand. Titus, my nurse just asked me what business Bruce was in. He has noticed that he comes and goes without a schedule. I explained that he was self employed and in commercial real estate and that he spends a lot of time in his car. And then it dawned on me. This occupation and his 20 years being his own man has made it possible for Bruce to be where I need him when I need him. This occupation that has many successful years and many stressful years (and when I say stressful years I mean more than 1 or 5 or...I bet you get my drift.) Seventen years later, this self employed guy can be here for me all the time, joyfully changing his schedule to work with my treatments, doctor visits, etc. God knew about this long ago and set things in motion to work it for my good...even though I am sure I prayed for a fantastic job with a great company who probably would not have been as accommodating of Bruce's schedule as I would like. God did not answer that prayer, asking me to trust in him and to wait on His timing. This was a light bulb moment for me, showing me God's providential hand.
I don't know what the plan will be after this. I will have another scan in 3 weeks and then we will sit down with Dr. Bevers to see what's next. But I am commanding myself NOT to look to far ahead or I might miss what God has in store for me. I am waiting expectantly to experience the blessings God has for me today, tomorrow and next week...as I rest in Him. I hope you do the same.
Thanks again for being such a blessing.
Dee Dee
In a Bible study this week we talked about the "providential hand of God"...God's hand in our lives. How He truly does work ALL things for good. Even if we can't see the good at the time. Even if we know it is not what we wanted, that the outcome is bad. It caused me to think about all the things in my past that have brought me where I am today. Starting with being raised by my folks in Mission, TX and going to Catholic school...good things. To meeting Bruce...a very good thing. To my children and their spouses. God's hand was in all of it. There were many ups and downs...many crisis...many doors closed (thank you God!) and many doors opened (thank you God!) But when you stop and look back you can see how each thing played out perfectly "for such a time as this" Esther 4:14. I suggest that this is a wonderful exercise, a wonderful growing in faith exercise for all of us Think about the past, all the good and bad, and look for God's hand in your life.
Update:I looked up from my reading this morning as we were driving to the med center. 6:45. A bit late. We were late because we stopped for Shipley donuts and we still needed to stop and pick up breakfast. But I had already prayed for peace, so I settled back for the rest of the trip. We were on Bellaire heading to MDA where the railroad tracks cross Bellaire...one with crossing arms... which were still up. As we crossed over I saw the train headed our way, maybe two or three streets over (hence the arms were still up. Did not want you to think that we tried to outrun the train!). If we had been a few seconds later, that long train would have stopped us and I would have gone bonkers! But it didn't. God had timed it perfectly. Yes, I do believe that is my growing awareness of the providential hand of God.
Update: I am now at MDA receiving my 6th "spa"treatment with super efficient Titus as my nurse.
All is going great. After chemo 5, I experienced many days of fatigue and a muddled mind...and I did not like it one bit! Honestly I think I was afraid it might not go away and that this may be my new normal. I got all anxious about it - anxious anxiety. But Psalm 62:5 reminded me "You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trust in you." So this was another example of my need to call on God, to put my trust in Him and His perfect plan for me. Praise God, the fatigue only lasted four and 3/4 days, but it left and I was back to my old self. (Correction: the fatigue left...not to sure about the muddled mind!) In Streams in the Desert I read "God provides resting places as well as working places. So rest and be thankful when He brings you, tired and weary to streams along the way." Yes, fatigue and a muddled mind are from God and I will joyfully accept them and rest. So my day at the"spa" will be followed by restful days at home. And I will whisper to the Lord for help when my foggy brain prevents me from spending quality time with Him. I will ask God to be with me instead of giving into the foggyness. God has it all planned, I just need to trust Him more.
Update: another example of God's providential hand. Titus, my nurse just asked me what business Bruce was in. He has noticed that he comes and goes without a schedule. I explained that he was self employed and in commercial real estate and that he spends a lot of time in his car. And then it dawned on me. This occupation and his 20 years being his own man has made it possible for Bruce to be where I need him when I need him. This occupation that has many successful years and many stressful years (and when I say stressful years I mean more than 1 or 5 or...I bet you get my drift.) Seventen years later, this self employed guy can be here for me all the time, joyfully changing his schedule to work with my treatments, doctor visits, etc. God knew about this long ago and set things in motion to work it for my good...even though I am sure I prayed for a fantastic job with a great company who probably would not have been as accommodating of Bruce's schedule as I would like. God did not answer that prayer, asking me to trust in him and to wait on His timing. This was a light bulb moment for me, showing me God's providential hand.
I don't know what the plan will be after this. I will have another scan in 3 weeks and then we will sit down with Dr. Bevers to see what's next. But I am commanding myself NOT to look to far ahead or I might miss what God has in store for me. I am waiting expectantly to experience the blessings God has for me today, tomorrow and next week...as I rest in Him. I hope you do the same.
Thanks again for being such a blessing.
Dee Dee
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